Day 3

It's no use, I can't do it. I need to go bk to the gym! I need the support of the trainers. I need to know that when home is an upside down mess I can escape for an hour or two and come back refreshed.

I have no will power or motivation :(

I'm a real foodie I think about cooking and eating all day it's almost an obsession. I love healthy food I'm a funny-tarian, meaning I only eat chicken, turkey, fish and prawns and all fruit and veg I can afford. It's the carbs!!! The breads, the cakes, the pasta, the rice, the muffins, the chocolate!!! Unlike cigarettes going cold turkey from any of those is virtually impossible, temptation I everywhere!

By the checkouts, infront of the shop doors always on special offer! So bright and colourful and shiny.

How do I defeat that?

I've switched from bread to pitta and wraps, no longer drink cows milk. Someone told me it was pus and that put me right off! I was a dairy lover until last week. Instead I opted for rice milk the equivalent to my skimmed milk.

The fridge is filled with healthier snacks for me and the children. Even cans of tinned fruit now sit in my cupboard.

I suppose I'm trying although I expected it to all happen on Monday it's a life long journey taken one step at a time.

I managed a 5 minute workout this afternoon I honestly thought I was going to pass out loool.

I did it though and I'm craving more so that's a good sign.

I still haven't had a cigarette but I really do want one or maybe two. I'm not gonna quit quitting though it's the only battle I'm winning outright.

Feeling more positive today than yesterday. Looking forward to tomorrow